Posted in Posts and podcasts

Senchan, Guaire and the mice of Gort -1853

J. H. Todd and Eugene Curry

Field Mouse
Photo: Reg McKenna
Wikimedia Common

Proceedings of the Royal Irish Academy (1836 – 1869), Vol.5 (1850-1853), pp. 355-366;
(abridged excerpt from On Rhyming Rats to Death )

On the death of Dallan Forgaill, the chief ollave, or poet of Erinn, about A.D. 600, Senchan Torpest, a distinguished poet of Connacht, was selected to pronounce the defunct bard’s funeral oration, and was subsequently elected to his place. Senchan formed his establishment of bardic officers and pupils on a larger scale than had been known since the revision of the bardic institution at the great meeting of Dromceat, some twenty years previously. As chief poet, he was entitled to make visitation with his retinue, of any of the provinces and to be entertained at the court of the provincial kings. The honour of being so visited was sought for with pride and satisfaction by the kings of Ireland.
Senchan, having consulted with his people, decided on giving the distinguished preference of their first visitation to his own provincial king, Guaire the Hospitable, king of Connacht. They were received hospitably and joyfully at the king’s palace, at the place now called Gort, in the county of Galway. During the sojourn of Senchan at Gort, his wife, Bridget, on one occasion, sent him a portion of a certain favourite dish. Senchan was not in his apartment when the servant arrived there; but the dish was left there, and the servant returned to her mistress. On Senchan’s return, he found the dish and, eagerly examining it, was sadly disappointed at seeing it contained nothing but a few fragments of gnawed bones.

Shortly after, the same servant returned for the dish, and Senchan asked what its contents had been. The maid explained it to him, and the angry poet threw an unmistakeable glance of suspicion on her. She, under his gaze, at once asserted her own innocence, stating that as no person could have entered the apartment from the time she left until he returned to it, the dish must have been emptied by mice.
Senchan believed the girl’s account and vowed that he would make the mice pay for their depredations, and he composted a metrical satire on them;

Mice, though sharp their snouts,
Are not powerful in battles;
I will bring death on the party
For having eaten Bridget’s present.

Small was the present she made us,
Its loss to her was not great,
Let her have payment from us in a poem,
Let her not refuse the poet’s gratitude!

You mice, which are in the roof of the house,
Arise all of you and fall down.

And thereupon ten mice fell dead on the floor from the roof of the house, in Senchan’s presence. And Senchan said to them: “It was not you that should have been satirized, but the race of cats, and I will satirize them.” And Senchan then pronounced a satire, but not a deadly one, on the chief of the cats of Erinn, who kept his princely residence in the cave of Knowth, near Slane, n the County of Meath.

Posted in Posts and podcasts

Part 3 – If you’re going to do a job, do it right – Cinderella

https://widgetworld3.wordpress.com/2013/06/17/part-3-if-youre-going-to-do-a-job-do-it-right-cinderella/

You could see the pumpkin in the picture too. Canadian pumpkins Martin Doege
You could see the pumpkin in the picture too.
Canadian pumpkins
Martin Doege
That wasn’t the only concern I had about the bauld Cinderella and her shoe. There were others and I had to attend to them as well. Daddy always said,
“If you’re going to do a job, do it right”. I took that on board at an early age and anyway, Cinderella was worthy of the best I could offer.
The next problem was the flight of stairs at the palace. There were a lot of them. St Assumpta never held the book up long enough for me to count them all. I rarely got past eleven before she’d move onto the next page, but at a glance there must have been at least thirty. They were all white and shiny, and laid out in a long curving arch that fanned out and down to the road beneath, where her pumpkin was parked when it was a coach. You could see the pumpkin in the picture too. It sat in the middle of the road at the bottom of the steps, surrounded by a few bewildered mice that looked completely out of sorts with their environment.
Bewildered mouse. Photo: George Shuklin
Bewildered mouse.
Photo: George Shuklin

I often wondered if those mice ever found their way home after the ball. It bothered me some nights before going to sleep. I reckoned that if Cinderella needed a carriage to go to the ball, that palace must have been a couple of miles down the road from her house. I knew she got home safe and sound, albeit at a mad gallop. The book said so. Clearly a couple of miles of a run was no bother to her. And she was fit too, from all the cleaning and scrubbing and washing floors. But what about the mice?
Mice are pretty fit too. In fact I’ve never seen a slow one, unless Minnie our cat hit it a few swipes first. They eat anything and everything and they never get fat because they’re always scuttling around, full of energy. They’re well able to run, that I was sure of.
My real concern was the distance they had to cover. A couple of miles to the bauld Cinderella would seem like hundreds of miles to a mouse. They’ve only tiny little legeens. Climbing a wall be like climbing Mount Everest so imagine what a two-mile hike would feel like to them? To make matters worse their height did them no favours. They’re so close to the ground a dandelion is like a small tree, a pothole the crater of a volcano, a field of grass a forest. Being vertically challenged also made it impossible for them to see more than a few feet ahead. That must make for hard work on a normal day’s travel in familiar surroundings. A strange place like the steps of the palace must have been terrifying. How could they even begin to find the road home or what direction to take home? It occurred to me that perhaps they could follow the direction Cinderella took off in, but if she took a short cut through a field they could be thrown off track. She was so fast and so far ahead they’d be likely to miss it. If they came to a crossroads they’d be ruined entirely. I’ve never heard of a mouse being able to read a signpost.
I never heard of a mouse being able to read a signpost. Narvik, Norway - 2407 km from North Pole Markus Bernet
I never heard of a mouse being able to read a signpost.
Narvik, Norway – 2407 km from North Pole
Markus Bernet

I asked Mother if mice could smell their way home, like dogs. I didn’t tell her why but she told me not to be an egit and lay the table. I had nothing to go on.
Those homeless mice were a worry indeed and after much thought I came to the conclusion that those mice got the rough end of the stick. They were left to their own devices.And did Cinderella care? Not a skerrick. She just casts them adrift in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of the night, in the cold, and runs off without them.
You wouldn't catch Snow White neglecting animals like that. Schneewittchen; Darstellung von Alexander Zick (1845 - 1907)  Grot'scher Verlag, Berlin. Alexander Zick, upload by Adrian Michael wikipedia.org
You wouldn’t catch Snow White neglecting animals like that.
Schneewittchen; Darstellung von Alexander Zick (1845 – 1907)
Grot’scher Verlag, Berlin.
Alexander Zick, upload by Adrian Michael wikipedia.org
If Cinderella was any way decent she should have put them in her pocket as she went past and made sure they got home. They were most obliging to her so it was the least she could have done. What if they had babies? And where was the fairy godmother in all this? You’d think she’d have the decency to cast a spell and make them float home?
You wouldn’t catch Snow White neglecting animals like that, not in a million years. She let birds and rabbits and deer and all sorts into her kitchen and the dwarfs didn’t seem to mind. Mind you, she was twice the size of them so she was likely to get her own way. Anyhow, wasn’t she cooking their dinners and washing their smalls, they’d have been right bloody egits to complain. No. In my opinion leaving the mice behind was a big failure on Cinderella’s part and it might have been no harm if she landed on her head going down those steps for such neglect. But she didn’t and I still had shoes to test.
Next on the agenda were stairs.